[ Poetry ]

This Grand Defeat

Amidst the ruins, amidst the stares

Amidst a conversation shared

Its fragments spoken, silence broken

The words come upon us unaware

The words, a street that leads nowhere

Where we stand, hand-in-hand

Alone within this frozen land

Side by side and much alive

Standing where we once had died

Dead as this city all around

Dead as this silence that surrounds

The burned-out buildings, the coffee shops

My pulsing blood, the pounding stops

To only start again.

 

A feast of colors within my mind

A swirling, whirling paradigm

This city…

These streets…

The broken glass about our feet

Reminders of our grand defeat.

 

Our throbbing hearts, their pulsing beats

Our eyes for fleeting seconds meet

Then in fear retreat.

 

I have often wondered…

Were it not for this city

Were it not for these streets

Were it not for the strong, the weak

Were it not for you, were it not for me

Would there be ruins?

Stares?

Would there be conversations shared?

 

But I’m brought back to the item at hand

Standing beside you, hand-in-hand

Taking in this frozen land

This wasted land

This city of hopes deserted.

I’m brought back again and again.

Where to begin? Where to begin?

To rebuild our city upon the sand

Upon the ruins of this frozen land?

 

Maybe I shall go alone,

Yes, alone

For my own sins I shall atone

And build my city one house at a time

And this city shall be mine, all mine

Yes, I alone this city shall own…

 

But I cannot bear to be alone.

 

So I stand,

Aware of my hand…

Your hand…

The blowing sand and blinding wind

When will this end? When?

When?

 

I bear my cross, the burden’s great

This frozen, wasted land I can’t escape

It is all so much to bear…

I think I much prefer the stares

The hungry eyes

Those lifeless vamps I so despise

They lurk within the shadows, within the dark

They’re driven by my pounding heart

And pounce upon my exposed fears

And feast on me for years and years

Laughing at my futile tears

Tears they sip off of my cheeks

Then ask if they can have a peak

Just a peak, a glimpse

A look within

To see the places that I’ve been

For they’re fixed permanently within this town

Without hope…

The city just pulls them down

And down…

Down beneath the frozen ground,

The deserted streets,

This grand city…

This grand defeat.

 

But I  survive their fierce, lifeless attacks

As I lay naked, helpless upon my back

I reach for your hand

And you reach down

Pulling me up from the ground

Meeting eyes, our gaze fixed

The tension high, emotions mixed

For a moment forgetting the frozen land

Becoming one through connected hands

For a moment forgetting the empty streets…

 

For a moment accepting this grand defeat!